My Perfect Salad

From the category of "Facebook Links I Didn't Click On" comes a post about my perfect salad.

It's awards season in Hollywood, in case you weren't aware, and my Facebook feed is inundated with flashy ads and headlines about who is nominated for what and who is wearing who and which neckline plunged where.  But one headline gave me pause, and it was along the lines of, "Red Carpet Celebs Asked to Describe Their Perfect Salad."  (The first person to send me the link, now that I've lost it, will receive a handcrafted thank-you note from me via snail mail)

It was just different enough and aligned with my own interests to spark some musings, inspired last night's dinner, and begat a blog post.

This, gentle reader, is my idea of a perfect salad.

It is some years in the making.  And ultimately Mike's recipe as he created the dressing in a culinary class at Utah Valley State College (now Utah Valley University).

Basically, it can be called a Steak Salad with Balsamic Vinaigrette, recipe below.

It is worth noting that I never, ever fail to overdress my portion. But in our home we take a hint from the French, and always have a fresh baguette handy while serving this.  And use it to sop up the dressing, parm and carrot shards at the end, or even as you go.  Our local Safeway marketplace has a great French bread, and makes it fresh around 5PM.  This is one of the few (read, very few) times I would opt out of sourdough.

Also, for the first time ever this go-round, I added croutons.  These croutons, to be exact:

I know, I know, they are Caesar, but they are awesome!  Garlicky and salty and thick enough to soak up some dressing and still be crunchy in the middle.  Got them at WallyWorld.

Stevenson's Perfect Salad

- Romaine lettuce (1 head, or 3 hearts), torn
- 3-4 medium carrots, peeled and grated
- 1/2 - 3/4 cup shredded parmesan cheese
- 2-3 lbs grilled New York Strip steak, sliced against the grain, fat trimmed
     (I prefer chilled, but it can be added warm from the grill, it's delicious either way)
- one handful or so New York brand Texas Toast Caesar croutons
- Mike's Balsamic Vinaigrette to taste (recipe below)
- a chunk of fresh French bread

Mike's Balsamic Vinaigrette

- 1/4 cup extra virgin olive oil
- 3/4 cup balsamic vinegar
- 1-2 tsp yellow mustard
- 1-2 tsp minced garlic
- salt/pepper to taste

Blend all ingredients in a food processor or blender until well blended.

Chocolate Pasta!

Our good friends the Scheels (and, like proper celebrities, when we refer to the group of us, we become the Scheelensons) and we have a tradition that, when any of us travel, we bring each other souvenirs.  Some are useful, some are not.  I struck gold, however, this past fall, when Megan brought me chocolate pasta from a farmer's market in exotic, faraway Kansas City!

I am not unique in that I love chocolate.  I am, however, quite picky about my pasta.  (I don't even like my own homemade spaghetti sauce)  And as far as noodles go, the thinner, the better.  This particular brand of pasta was flat, and wider than my preferred angel hair - more like a fettucine shape. So, right off the bat, I was suspicious.

Then, this happened:

First of all, the paper crafter in me wanted to slice off the left and bottom margins so that the text was at least centered.  There were clearly four copies of this slapped onto an 8.5x11 sheet and chopped quickly.

Secondly, the editor in me wrung her hands at the typo in instruction #2 that changed the word "Cook" to "Cool."  Those are two completely different instructions that yield completely different results in a recipe.  Check yourselves, Pappardelle's.

Actually boiling up the pasta was fun.  It smelled like cooking pudding on the stovetop in the 80's, all chocolaty and warm and something almost chemical.  I considered for a moment what could be done with chocolate water.  And then poured it down the sink.

A note about "al dente" (or, to the tooth): Al dente means that there is still some firmness in the middle of the noodle.  I have eaten pasta in both America and Italy.  The Italians cook it in the strictest form of al dente, and I was not a fan.  Give me the Olive Garden, smoosh-it-on-the-roof-of-my-mouth soggy pasta any day.

Per the instructions, I cooled it down and put in the fridge to chill.  Nothing looks quite as appetizing as brown noodles, right?

Strawberry sauce-making:

This made my kitchen smell magnificent!  Brewing up some warm strawberry syrup was a skill I didn't know I always wanted. (Name the movie?)

To fully participate in the chocolate pasta experience, I didn't mess with the serving suggestions at all.  I dutifully poured the strawberry syrup over the chilled noodles, then a dollop of whipped cream, like so:

And…we were underwhelmed.

There was only the slightest bit of chocolate flavor.  And plenty of empty pasta texture, which is not my favorite.  As it turns out, cold noodles are only acceptable the morning after a triumphant dinner of chicken pad thai. You can quote me.

This is what my bowl looked like when I was ready to run it to the sink:

And I think Megan herself summed it up best when she said, "My favorite parts were the strawberries and Cool Whip."

I'm sure the good folks at Pappardelle's worked hard on this product.  And kudos for being inventive and thinking outside the box.  I just couldn't quite catch the vision.  But, if anyone at the company ever deigns to read this, I invite you to send me samples of any of your offerings and I will be fair and impartial in revisiting your products.

A Gift of Two Ounces

If you came here looking for a before/after picture of my winter feet, sorry to disappoint.  This post is to trumpet the accomplishment of one Heather Aunspach (although granted, my new soft heels will certainly help the cause). I simply don't want to revisit this post and see only the jagged remnants of lavender nail polish that remain in the middle of my big toes from some long-forgotten painting session of last fall.

This is my pretty friend Heather!  She is one of a kind.  She has provident living down.  She is a domestic expert…knowing exactly what to do with unsprouted wheat, uses every item in her Bountiful Basket every week, preserves and cans and stores with precision.  In several ways over the years, she and I have crossed paths, including church programs such as visiting teaching, as well as our boys attending preschool and swim lessons at the local YMCA together.

For Christmas 2014, she made lotion bars to give out. Made lotion bars, folks. I received one as a gift, then Heather forgot that she had given me one, and I scored another!  Hehehe.

Heather used three ingredients.  Three!  She used zero scents or coloring in her bars.  My foodie nose, however, believes there is a hint of anise (said with a pretentious air). 

I have used the bar on my feet and heels every day for about a week and a half.  I have spent a lot of money at Bath and Body Works and Avon over the years (so, not a huge or expensive albeit a long quest) on cracked heel products as I inherited my dad's heels.  I have no earthly idea what Heather's three ingredients cost, although she did have to special order them, as no local store carries them.  

Notwithstanding, this product is head and shoulders above anything I have tried. And I got it for free.  From my friend. 

One of the best parts?  She didn't want to clean the pot in which she made the batch. So she brewed it up in a #10 can and then threw the can away!  Ha, ha!  Genius!

This is what it looks like: 

It is a simple 2 oz disposable plastic jar with lid. And this is what it looks like when you pop it out to use it:

(Yep, and also showing off my mani by my new pal Amanda Johnson)

On another note: Heather has also created, designed, and developed a line of superhero-themed weighted compression belts for kiddos with autism and other sensory processing disorders.  Told you she was one of a kind!  Check out her Etsy shop, ShesMakingSense here.